September 2012
nikkichaleur:
“no,” I whisper absently to my computer screen while browsing through pictures of attractive people. protesting against their angelic features, I sigh vehemently, “just stop that.” but they don’t stop. they continue to be attractive and I continue to morph into a sack of potatoes.
liveinphoenix:
do you ever get like random bursts of wanting to do something productive like HEY IM GUNNA WRITE A BOOK or IM GUNNA DRAW SOMETHING YEAH but then after like five minutes you realise you cant do either and go back to doing nothing at all
3 tags
ghostpulse:
THERE WAS THIS WOMAN WHO CAME IN TO TARGET TODAY AND ALL SHE BOUGHT WAS A CUCUMBER AND “50 SHADES OF GREY” AND OH MY GOD I TRIED SO HARD NOT TO LAUGH.
trust:
have you ever seen someone so attractive that you can’t even look at them because it’s like you’re embarrassing yourself
i am really legitimately terrified of romney winning the election
i’m british and i’m terrified.
i’m greek and i’m terrified
i’m brazilian and i’m terrified
i’m german and i’m terrified
i’m polish and i’m terrified
i’m portuguese and i’m terrified
im from outer space and i’m terrified
i’m australian and i’m terrified
i’m norwegian and i’m terrified
i’m satan and...
3 tags
dylanobabe:
i like my men unattainable and out of my league
1 tag
I need a cute boy to come along and stuffs so that I may get a crush on him.
I’m actually over the other guy I used to have a crush on.
2 tags
Fashion is about being pale apparently.
August 2012
the only reason i stay inside all day is to avoid the paparazzi
victro:
i can’t respect you if you eat pizza with a knife and fork
Normal people flirting: hey youre cute we should go out sometime (;
Me trying to flirt: so do you like bread
1 tag
Cosmo sex tip #367
cosmo-sex-tips:
While having sex, suddenly stop before she reaches orgasm and say “And none for gretchen weiners, bye” and walk out of the room.
4 tags
So, I’m watching a cute video where this guy is rough housing with his cat. The cat is meowing. He pushes the cat over. Cat comes back and play bites his hand. And so on and so forth.
And I swear on satan’s butthole every dumbass thinks this is animal abuse.
If you’ve ever owned a pet that wasn’t imaginary or had health conditions, you’d understand that animals...
1 tag
My mom just informed me that we are going camping on Saturday/Sunday.
Oh…okay.
1 tag
Appreciate those that are still by your side.
4 tags
Am I the only one kind of dreading that ONE person (or multiple…) who takes a picture of Sp00n’s face and posts it all over the internet?
Seriously guys, let’s try and NOT scare him away. He means a lot to many of his subscribers and it would be a shame to lose him due to losers not respecting his privacy.
1 tag
My eyes keep unfocusing themselves.
HELP.
toxic-ponies:
friendly reminder taylor swift and adele are the same age and one of them is married and pregnant while the other is still mentally stuck in middle school
